October 2010
1 post
SORRY, FORGOTTEN TUMBLR
-yesterday my apple was too big
-my chai tea tasted kind of metallic in my REI insulated mug
-i ran out of parchment paper for ease of baking homemade cookies
-the bank will only match 100% of our savings in the “keep the change” program for 3 months
September 2009
3 posts
rachel: so i see your web content convo and raise you one [coworker a] teaches [coworker b] how ocr works convo. “well it’s hard to understand how any of that works.”
me: well, it is.
rachel: it’s not once you learn about the 11 types of magical computer elves that live inside computers. duh. the reading elf just tells the light-bright elf what to put on the screen and...
“ok, so i’m listening to [REDACTED]’s oral history. and it’s...”
– rachel, honorary bougetarded blogger
August 2009
6 posts
work-subsidized insurance only covering half a $500 optometrist bill
forgetting to turn off the “Someone votes in a poll I posted” email notification when posting a poll in your livejournal
have read the entire internet and STILL have twenty minutes left at work.
brain gyroscope going nuts, can’t sleep —> take xanax —> can’t wake up
July 2009
9 posts
7-minute conversation in the dairy section of the grocery store about which kind of milk and yogurt to buy based on the quality of life of the cows.
PROBLEM: No one told me about sofia coppola juice boxes, aka tiny little cans of sparkling white wine that come with their own BENDY STRAW, before Tuesday! TRAVESTY, I CAN’T BELIEVE I’VE LIVED SO LONG WITHOUT THIS PRODUCT.
We keep forgetting, when we’re at IKEA, to buy a bigger glass bowl to put the little kitchen windowsill cactus in.
my house is making me unhappy because I have too much stuff and I want to take everything I own to goodwill.
Pottery Barn has charged my credit card for my new couch, but they haven’t contacted me to arrange delivery yet. If I get grifted by Pottery Barn, I’m pretty sure I have to kill myself with a garlic press, or something equally bougetarded.
self-medication with white wine, v. 2.0
both of the very expensive herman miller office chairs hurt my body, in different ways.
HAVING TO DRIVE THE CAR WITH NO A/C TO WORK TOMORROW.
June 2009
22 posts
dudski:
COCKBLOCK: AM NOT SEEING THE PROPOSAL TONIGHT, HAVE OFFICIALLY REACHED “WHICH DOUCHEBAGS FROM WORK WILL GO SEE IT WITH ME” THRESHOLD.
DOUBLE COCKBLOCK: TUMBLR WON’T EVEN LET ME UPLOAD THE POSTER TO ILLUSTRATE THIS RANT. WHATEVR.
totally a first world problem. OH SNAP!
Being sleepy at work because you stayed up too late watching Ryan Reynolds movies.
the entire catalog of netflix is not available for instant viewing
trying to decide if “vegetarian fed” is as acceptable for your organic free range beef as “grass fed”
the herman miller aeron chair makes my bottom sore
trying to coordinate with your pharmacy and doctors all your prescription refills for birth control and antidepressants
having the wrong kind of rum to make mojitos this weekend
“the bacon in this BLT isn’t crispy enough!”
getting signed up for tumblr against your will
complaining because the A/C in your office is just too cold
limping because your new summer sandals have given you blisters
realizing you’re gassy because of the kashi cereal
settling for Kenya AA or Sumatra when the store is out of Kona
hangover from self-medicating with a bottle of white wine
running out of french vanilla creamer for your coffee
the gross buildup of hand lotion under the settings of the gems in your rings